This is necessary as we know that alot of readers are interested in our team members. We are very attractive.
Jules - for sale. Worth her height in gold. Needs a man taller than 2.00 m and has the ability to care, love, and respect her needs. He should look like Jono.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
The girls of Special Ops
We've had so many.
Nikki "that way Nikki!!!!" Seto - scored a try for us.
Sarah "Stu's sister" Young - is in the team due to family relations.
Sarah "Not Stu's sister" Young - is in the team because she asked to be.
Jules "COME ON BOYS" Teh - is a one woman cheer leading squad.
Daniel "butt cramp" Lim - Team albino. Genetic testing showed that she wasn't a he. Always a favourite with strange women and Canterbury men.
Nikki "that way Nikki!!!!" Seto - scored a try for us.
Sarah "Stu's sister" Young - is in the team due to family relations.
Sarah "Not Stu's sister" Young - is in the team because she asked to be.
Jules "COME ON BOYS" Teh - is a one woman cheer leading squad.
Daniel "butt cramp" Lim - Team albino. Genetic testing showed that she wasn't a he. Always a favourite with strange women and Canterbury men.
Top 6 touch injuries
6. Mark gets beaten up by the other team because he made a touch with his foot. Because his playing strip got ripped in the fight, he is unable to play for us anymore.
5. Richard 'pass me the ball' Wong - After his legs were disabled. his hands were also taken out. Struggles to catch a ball generally, even harder when his hands are fully taped up. Known from then as a nuisance on the field because of his disabilities.
4. Stuart 'roll off the ground' Young - Easter 2007. After regular cramping, the only way to sub off the field without walking was to roll. So that's what he did, from the other side of the field.
3. Daniel 'ball in the face' Lim - Easter 2006. After seeing Erin Fong's nuts in the team bedroom, Erin decided to show Daniel his other ball skills, but this time it was a touch ball from zero range.
2. Richard 'I want my mummy' Wong - Easter 2007. Vs Canterbury Mens. Horrific injury that ended the game literally. After the aid of team mate Daniel, his injuries became apparent as school girl like screams echoed around the park.
This below photo is the aftermath. We couldn't beat Canterbury, so we asked them to feel sorry for us at least.
1. Daniel 'butt cramp' Lim - Easter 2007,. this unfortunate injury happened under serious circumstances, before the game whilst training. Took him out for 4 games due to his chronic ass crramps. Rectified later in the team van
6. Mark gets beaten up by the other team because he made a touch with his foot. Because his playing strip got ripped in the fight, he is unable to play for us anymore.
5. Richard 'pass me the ball' Wong - After his legs were disabled. his hands were also taken out. Struggles to catch a ball generally, even harder when his hands are fully taped up. Known from then as a nuisance on the field because of his disabilities.
4. Stuart 'roll off the ground' Young - Easter 2007. After regular cramping, the only way to sub off the field without walking was to roll. So that's what he did, from the other side of the field.
3. Daniel 'ball in the face' Lim - Easter 2006. After seeing Erin Fong's nuts in the team bedroom, Erin decided to show Daniel his other ball skills, but this time it was a touch ball from zero range.
2. Richard 'I want my mummy' Wong - Easter 2007. Vs Canterbury Mens. Horrific injury that ended the game literally. After the aid of team mate Daniel, his injuries became apparent as school girl like screams echoed around the park.
This below photo is the aftermath. We couldn't beat Canterbury, so we asked them to feel sorry for us at least.
1. Daniel 'butt cramp' Lim - Easter 2007,. this unfortunate injury happened under serious circumstances, before the game whilst training. Took him out for 4 games due to his chronic ass crramps. Rectified later in the team van
Player profiles - David
The youngest on our team, still with train-track teeth. Newest addition on our team too, we picked him up at 17, fresh out of puberty (his voice is the deepest in the team) as we needed someone to do the running for us. He's also a rep player, so that means he's good enough to play for us.
His skills - going to school.
His skills - going to school.
Player profiles - Joe
The enforcer of our team. He speaks with confidence, if only he'd run that way. We like practicing against him because he's easy. He's not very fast. Quick thinker but slow on the field. A cop so a natural at catching PI offenders.
His skills are chasing people from behind.
His skills are chasing people from behind.
Player profiles - Richard
Richard James Robert Wong is the envy of all women with his slim frame whilst he eats like a hobo. He's a very fast runner, and a very fast cramper too. His legs buckled pretty badly in one game, screaming for his mummy and his money. Who said Scrooge McDuck couldn't play sports? ...Nah he's actually a really generous guy, he's part of Rotaract after all. Outside of touch rugby, he works 25 hours a day, thanks to his excellent ability to organize himself.
His skills are defence
Player profile - Jimmy Chong
Our honest worker. He's always got a smile on his face you'd think he won the Lotto. In fact he kind of had, when he got invited to join our team. As a doctor in training, we knew that we needed a medic on the touch field in case we got touched too hard. True to the study nature of a medical doctor, Jimmy is always putting in the hard yards and is ever-ready to do the grinding out work.
His skills are studying
His skills are studying
Player profile - Jono
The lady's man. Thanks to him, we were also able to form a mixed touch team, which features girls and boobies. He's got freckles.
His skills are being reliable and showing up to our games
Player profiles - Jimmy Dai
The team clown, and he doesn't even realize it. His left is right but his right is left. Remember the old brain joke: His brain has a problem - his left hemisphere has nothing right in it and his right hemisphere has nothing left in it. I'm not saying he's dumb by the way - he's very smart. He's an accountant.
His skills 'GWEEDY"
Pre Special Ops
Before the days of the mighty Special Ops, there existed another invincible team named Special FX. Below is the only known video of that team in action.
Player profiles - Martin
Shit, where do we start with this guy? We call him Martin Nonu because of his freak ability to break the line, but at the same time his erraticness in catching his balls. Other teams fear him because he looks like Bruce Lee. He's got dragon-strength - at 55 kg have you seen his triceps? Of course not, you have to take a step back to see it. This guy has the most potential in our team, he runs very fast, so fast that he's known for scoring on the other field too. Anyway, it can be hard to take this guy seriously - he grafitis on the aeroplane parts that his engineering team repairs and he celebrates his birthday twice a year.
His skills are chasing plastic bags that got blown away.
Player profiles - Stuart
Started the "Special" phenomenon by captaining a team named the Special Effects. Little is known about that team other than the fact that he led it. That team must have really been down the gutter, as he now claims to have Alzhemer's Disease and can't remember a thing. Stuart's skills are there for all to see - he always wins the shuttle runs. Unfortunately the Tamaki Touch comp won't be able to witness that as he's opting to go drinking with his workmates every Friday instead.
His skills are forgetting about the past
Player profiles - Chris
His birthday is in January - had to write that as we always forget. He's also known as the grass cutter, he leaves touch fields in torrid states with his boot-work. He's the Gregan of touch rugby, he chats to the ref constantly, teaching them how to play the game and that sort of thing. Its great to have him on the team - he's always enthusiastic about putting his body on the line. A Schalk Burger of touch rugby too I guess you could say. His trademark dive is to look like a frog entering into the water.
His skills - as his girlfriend.
His skills - as his girlfriend.
Player profiles - Sean Lim
Sean "Yew Chern" Lim is our competitive defender. As he has an aversion to diving (it hurts his arm) he runs extra hard on defence to touch offenders. He's got a very good understanding of the game, but that counts for little as he walks and thus runs funny - its to do with the way he positions his feet on the ground.
His skills - dancing.
Player profiles - Nick Burbridge
The token white guy. We used to have two of them but Daniel left the team after we bullied him too much. Its a funny thing these Albinos, you'd think they weren't healthy people but they run fast. As a result, Nick is our #1 finisher, his spot is on the wing but he has potential to be awesome in the middle. It must be to do with Western culture, they want their fingers in all the pies. Anyway, true to his genetics he is also tall.
His skills: fast runner.
His skills: fast runner.
Player profiles - Nick Lim
The youngest on our team, also the oldest looking. He has a scar on his face, so don't touch him - he might go down on you (or should we say, up on you), yes he's also the shortest - so he's a real Napoleon. The story about little dogs biting the hardest is true, a bit of a quickie this one. He gets onto the the field looking like one mean bullpup reading to touch everything.
His skills - passing from the base of the ruck.
Coach profiles - Opura Takatikatungatooga
Opura Takatikatungatooga (sorry, typo may be present) is the coach of our team. He picked out our team of (then) losers from the Lloyd Elsemore competition and turned us into winners and whingers. Without him, Special Ops touch would simply be Special Needs touch. He taught us to respect Islander touch stylez and realize our potential in the game.
His skills are passing.
His skills are passing.
Player profiles - Kerhan
They say that teams are built on individuals. The truth of this touch team is that Special Ops is based on one individual. The Special Ops touch team without Kerhan would just be The Ops touch team - he is simply talismatic.
His skills are running back fast (after being blitzed by the scooper)
Special Ops touch team blog
This blog has been created to later make a proper website dedicated to our very special touching team - the Special Ops.
We're a bunch of very fine individuals who have a heart for grabbing other men at their shoulders and love spinning our balls. Soon the world will hear of us through our website and spread the word - "FEAR US OKAHU BAY! FEAR US TAMAKI TOUCH!"
We're a bunch of very fine individuals who have a heart for grabbing other men at their shoulders and love spinning our balls. Soon the world will hear of us through our website and spread the word - "FEAR US OKAHU BAY! FEAR US TAMAKI TOUCH!"
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